August  2007

            would love to start this page with the grandiose proclamation: “Jamaica is a land of contrasts” -   but that is a bit overblown.  Truth to tell, Jamaica is really just a ghetto located in one Earth’s most picturesque spots.  If the water wasn’t as blue, or the mountains as green, or the sunsets as captivating, no right-minded soul would set foot on this island.    But the water is in fact that mesmerizing, as are the mountains and sunsets – so the people come.  Many leave happy, though I suspect an equal number leave disillusioned, feeling betrayed by the travel brochures and Hollywood depictions of Jamaica. 

This was our first real terrestrial trip to Jamaica (I did the Ocho Rios thing 15 years ago via cruise ship) – and have purposely avoided the island ever since for all the right reasons.  But alas, the circumstances were right this time around (cheap direct flight from LAX to Montego Bay!), so what the hell – might as well see how bad it is.     

We spent six night on the Cliffs in west Negril, splitting our time between the quiet, zen-like Tensing Pen and the comfortable, tourist-friendly Rockhouse Hotel.  Both were great in their own right.  And I would even go so far as to recommend this destination to like-minded travelers.* 

Rock House Hotel

Negril Sunset

The Perfect Table

Rock House Hotel

Daily Visitor

     Overall thoughts on Jamaica?

The Good:  These pictures should say it all.   The Cliffs of Negril are stunning.  Jumping into the warm clear water from 20-foot cliffs is a great time.  The scene is so picturesque that one hardly feels guilty sitting around doing nothing all day.   Also in the “good” camp is the Jamaican cuisine.  Jerk anything, well prepared, is delicious.   Curried or Thermidore lobster?   Woo.   And it is for these reasons that we may one day return – just to sit on this porch (in between meals) patiently awaiting sunset.   I would also add that I am a big Reggae fan, so it was nice to be in the motherland.  

The Bad and the Ugly: A Jamaican novice by every measure, I went in with eyes wide open and low expectations.  They were met.  Barely.  I remember the harassment from my brief visit years ago, and have read enough horror stories online to want to avoid even the Jamaican airspace – but the magnitude of the hassle factor didn’t resonate until we were on the ground.  I appreciate that I am nothing more that a walking tourista cash machine in 90% of destinations that I visit – but I have never felt it as much as in Jamaica. 

On the danger front – it seems prevalent, but can be avoided (at the cost of restricted cultural and sight-seeing opportunities, of course).   What the real risk is, it’s hard to say.  But when the concierge and fellow guests recommend a taxi ride to a destination 100 yards from the hotel, that raised a few questions.   Another example:  there was a little convenience store across the two-lane road from Tensing Pen.  Suzie and I decided to pick up a couple of Red Stripes for the room.  In our 30 second walk across the street we were propositioned 3 times, physically grabbed once and aggressively berated once.  At noon.  It was like a game of Frogger to get beer– except that the cars are the least of your concerns.   I am sure it is mostly harmless, but I wouldn’t want to be there for the ‘other’ few times. 

 In my limited experience, the locals that actually were friendly were also fairly transparent about being friendly only as part of their job.  And it’s not that the locals are just poor farmers and fisherman with a quiet distaste for the bloated and obnoxious tourists.  They are down right scary and dangerous - at least the ones that the tourists are likely to encounter on the streets.   Now this may be unfair.  The average Jamaican might be the most congenial of sorts, tainted by the image of a small percentage of ne’er-do-wells that swarm around the touristy spots like gnats.  Who knows.  But I do know this: if the other Jamaicans are great – you won’t have the pleasure of discovering this during the average holiday.

*So...who should go to Jamaica?  I think there are three camps:  (i)  folks that don’t mind staying in an all-inclusive, mega-compound, buffet line, group activity resort like Sandals, where one never leaves the walled grounds; (ii) fairly well traveled folks who don’t mind a bit of edge and hassle, who are looking for something different, but have enough resources to stay in nice hotels insulated from the din, and finally (iii) rugged travelers who are willing to put up with danger, strife and disease just for kicks.  Who should NOT go to Jamaica:  Everyone else.  I kid – I’m sure that anyone can have a fun in Jamaica if they plan appropriately.

That said, I expect that it would be the relatively inexperienced travelers who are most at risk. People who are torn between Nassau, St. Thomas, and Jamaica as the perfect paradise ß   based on the deal-of-the-century that was ‘accidentally’ faxed to their office by some unscrupulous travel agent.  These people will come home sour and burned (on many levels).  

That’s my two cents. 

Sure the opinion might be myopic and unfair – but that was our impression.

Mosquito Repellant

Check out the name of this place!

Dinner at Rock House